Don’t Forget Your First Baby
Some families put a lot of years in between their children. They do this for many reasons, and each reason is valid. On the other hand, other families try to have a second baby shortly after they have their first baby. This is also something that is a personal choice, and is a good one for some families. Whatever you wish to do, remember that you have a bit more on your plate when you have them close together. Don’t lax on the development of your older baby when the new one comes along.
Your first baby is your first experience with raising kids. Your first child is going to bring about all the joy you could ever imagine, and then some. Many moms that have their kids one right after another do it because they are so overcome with love for their first baby that they want to have more to feel that love over and over again. Some also do it because they want to get the tough stuff, like getting up all night and changing diapers/potty training, out of the way all within a few years. Siblings feel closer this way, but there can be some problems for the oldest child.
The first baby shows parents how to do it, and they are then more relaxed with the second, third and even forth baby that comes into the home. Once the second child is born, it can be common for the first baby to be very jealous, and if the parents have a medical crisis with the second, the first child often feels a bit neglected. This may not be a huge problem in most families, but for some, this can mean problems later in life for the first child. Make sure you multiple your love rather than splitting it, even when one baby needs more attention.
The first baby often grows up being the one that got the most disciple. Lets face it, as you get older, you have less and less energy to be as strict as you want to be. The first baby is often the one with the most responsibility too, which is something that some of them may resent as they age. Be careful to remember when you started each type of chore or responsibility with your first baby so that you can make things exactly the same for each child thereafter. Your younger children won’t notice, but your oldest will be sure to notice when things are not what they call ‘fair.’
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On the other hand, some parents are so in love with their first baby that they almost feel a bit put out by the second baby. This is not common, but it does happen. They feel as if the child that comes second is taking away time that the parents would have normally spent with the first child. If you find that you are feeling this way, you may be trying to hard to make things fair. You can love your first and second babies without neglecting the other or feeling overwhelmed. Remember, the best time that you can spend is when you are all together at the same time – there is plenty of love to go around.